How to Change the World
Advice from my 23-year-old nephew, Campbell
Saturday night was a delight and a doozy—and ended with a gift of advice that might change the world. Are you ready?
THE DELIGHT
As of last week, three Mishel family members are living in the Pacific Northwest! This is massive news. I have been the lone Mishel family member to reside in Washington state for eons. In September Campbell, nephew, moved to Orcas Island. My mom, Narelle moved to Mercer Island 9 days ago. This past weekend Campbell came for a visit and the Sussex + Mishel clan united.
THE DOOZY
Saturday night there was a stimulating socio-political conversation among five adults.
The players included:
🤵♂️husband, Steve
⛷️nephew, Campbell
👸mother, Narelle
😻daughter-in-law, Courtney
👿me.
On a cozy fall night, over a dinner of perfectly grilled salmon, broccolini, cucumber salad and grilled potatoes, three days before a contentious midterm election cycle, this family got into it. Voices rose (👸 👿), questions were posed, accusations were made (👿), catastrophes were assumed, society was deemed intolerant, the news media untrustworthy and flip-floppy (🤵♂️⛷️). The usually unflappable got flappable (🤵♂️), the youngest kept his cool ⛷️, listened to all viewpoints and voiced his own wishes (burn-down-this-popsicle-stand and start again).
There was the good human who was willing to eat from the smorgasbord of all sides, kept her cool and smiled (😻). There was the righteous citizen (👿) who for years has expounded on how she wishes people would stop defending their positions, let down their guard, listen to each other and talk, really TALK. Why can’t we all get along? She’s the worst of the lot. Slinging mud, intolerant, agitated that all other views aren’t mirror images of her own. Life’s funny this way, isn’t it?
THE DELIGHT
While not the cheeriest of topics, at some point 👿 settled down in time to see that this was a really good conversation. What made it good? The fact that 🤵♂️, ⛷️ ,👸, 😻, 👿had diverse enough viewpoints to make for an enlightening conversation. Enlightening how? We chewed into the topics at hand, articulated our peeves, our hopes, our disagreements, and the usual moments of contention (where 👿 can’t believe she’s married to 🤵♂️, oblivious that 🤵♂️ could be also wondering what the hell he’s doing with 👿 ) and remained connected just enough to understand where everyone was coming from—and even saw the common ground!
We are not so different, really. And we love each other, we really do.
THE DOOZY
Who gets the crown in the family for being the most defensive, and the most verbally intolerant? 👿 🙋🏻♀️
Who was quasi-bullying 🤵♂️ for questioning a news outlet after walking a story back? 👿 🙋🏻♀️
Despite the insults 👿 slung her husband’s way when she feels threatened by differening opinions, who loves her anyway? 🤵♂️
Who dismissed ⛷️’s information sources with: “He’s the worst, getting his news from YouTube sound bites, these kids!” 👿 🙋🏻♀️
Who sat opposite 👿, holding a beautiful, open stance, showing what it looks like to be loving in the face of disagreement, who shrugged and said, “you could be right”? ⛷️
Who has said, “Wisdom has nothing to do with age”? My friend Stephanie.
THE DELIGHT
Who sat outside and ate with the dead as the adults debated indoors in front of a fire?
THE DOOZY
The matriarch of the group 👸, two weeks from turning 90, sighed and said, in a matter of speaking that society is fucked. “Good luck, it’s all yours,” she laughed.
👿 was 😤
THE DELIGHT
The matriarch’s daughter, a bit of steam coming out of her nose, her baby devil-horns visible, took some deep breaths. She had been gazing at her husband, his neck a light pink from the heat of emotions; she remembered how agreeably he’s been, taking his mother-in-law all over town the past week while his wife worked. She did really love him.
“OK,” the matriarch’s daughter said. “We can complain all day long. How do we create the world we want from all of . . . THIS?”
Quiet. One audible sigh. The sound of grandkids playing in the next room. The young compassionate revolutionary, his shoulders back against the dining room chair, kind-faced, spoke.
“Maybe you could start by accepting your differences,” he points to 🤵♂️ and 👿. Addresses his aunt specifically. “Get along with the people we live with.”
Dinner was over. Advice taken. This story is over. ⛷️ blew my mind. Respect.
I can create the world I want to live in, at home. That’s a worthwhile start.
Beauty Hunter is a space where we examine the whole bag of life through the lens of beauty—going so far as to imagine Beauty as the Purpose of Life.
Beauty Hunter includes the Salon for Beauty Hunters, a gathering of curious-minded people who want to talk about the larger issues of life from an exploratory POV.
What a night!!! Love the honesty and resolution. Your nephew is a wise soul. Xoxoxo j